Fitz Blog: UA's Dean Wormer closes Animal House

2013-04-08T20:00:00Z 2013-04-08T20:38:55Z Fitz Blog: UA's Dean Wormer closes Animal HouseDavid Fitzsimmons The Arizona Daily Star Arizona Daily Star

     The University of Arizona announced the expulsion of the fourth fraternity to be shut down in 15 months for “Behaving in such a crass, destructive and despicable fashion we all wish we could have been members of your fraternity. When is rush week?”

     The local chapter of I Phelta Thigh had been in trouble 327 times since 2010 for incidents including hazing, pillaging, arson, operating a catapult without a license, indecent exposure, war atrocities, kidnapping, and underage alcohol abuse that ended with students being hospitalized for excessive bloating.

     Local members of the fraternity, face down in their own vomit, were unavailable  for comment. I Phelta Thigh Joins the discredited University of Arizona fraternities we have listed here:

     Slappa Hamma Jamma, Omega Bong Toke, Krappa Smelta Delta, Sigma Upskirt, Ooh Mau Mau, Kappa Delta Omigod, Tri Chugga Sunblock, Alfalfa Magma, Alpha Romeo Pajama, Smegma Rho, Tappa Kegga Nu, Sigma Phi Hair Salon, Delta Helter Skelter, Phi Delta Burke, Falafel Babylon, Enigma Won Ton, and Tater Tot Epsilon.



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David Fitzsimmons is the Star's editorial cartoonist.

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